How decisive are you? Banish the fear of making a decision with our quiz
Life is complex and filled with decisions to be made. From outfits to food to finances, barely a moment goes by without having to choose something. Deliberating takes time and making the right decision may be a weighty choice that can make you want to opt out of any selection at all.
Yet making no decision, or nominating someone else to choose on your behalf, is a decision in itself. So, it’s probably best to take action in a way that serves you. The way you make a choice reveals a lot about you. According to psychologists, there are two approaches – maximising and satisficing.
‘Maximisers’ are those compelled to make the very best decision. They do so by weighing up all the options first. While this is thorough, it can leave you feeling drained. Anxiety is highly likely to arise from either not being able to make a decision, or fretting that you’ve made the wrong choice once the deed is done.
In the opposite camp sits the ‘satisficer’ who deciphers what’s acceptable and settles on it. With an abundance of mental energy saved from not deliberating over every available choice, the satisficer confidently chooses, accepts the decision, then carries on with their life.
They are efficient and effective in their execution of finding a good option that will meet their needs, rather than exploring every possible option. They choose satisfaction over perfection every single time, and are a lot happier for it.
The popular series The Good Place features a character named Chidi Anagogne, a quintessential maximiser who is forced to face his fatal flaw – crippling indecisiveness. Chidi’s inability to make the simplest of decisions is something he must work on to alleviate a lifetime of suffering he’s created for himself – and those around him.
When indecisiveness reaches extremes and causes severe problems in social settings and day to day functioning, it can be classified as a mental illness called aboulomania. Derived from Greek and meaning “without will”, this is a disorder of indecisiveness that makes it impossible to live autonomously. It’s typically associated with stress, depression and anxiety.
Learn to make bolder decisions
When it comes to consumer choice, variety is good, but more choice isn’t always better. A study conducted by researchers from Columbia and Stanford Universities presented people with samples of either six or 24 flavours of jam at a supermarket display table. The researchers found that when people were offered less choices, they were more likely to buy the product.
Choice overload arises when you have to decide between too many roughly equivalent options, as this increases your stress and anxiety. To sidestep the mental overload, try to limit your choices and keep things simple.
Indecisiveness is largely driven by fear. What if you choose wrong? What if you miss out? What if there’s better out there? Consider another way to move through the process of picking that creates a more liberating experience – trust yourself to act now and choose well. Understand that decisiveness stems from calm confidence too.
To develop your self-confidence, visualise your most confident self making a calm, clear, timely decision. Another way to boost your confidence is to affirm it to yourself. Regularly repeating a powerful affirmation such as “I am confident in myself and the decisions I make” can support you in replacing the self-sabotage with something far more beneficial.
In the end, you must accept that you can only do your best. Trust your gut and take timely action, accepting the consequences. The decisions you make may work out well or leave a lot to be desired, but every time you make a choice you’re saying yes to exploring something new.
Take our quiz below
Making quick and confident decisions helps us to move through life smoothly. Find out how decisive you are by taking our quiz below.
1. Three new restaurants open up in your area – Thai, Mexican and Italian. You love all three and decide to...
- A: Let your partner choose – you don’t want to pick the wrong one.
- B: Decide on Mexican, second guess yourself and go towards the Thai, then arrive and read reviews for the Italian.
- C: Head straight to the Italian – you know you’re in the mood for pasta tonight!
2. When it comes to decluttering spaces around the home, how ruthless are you?
- A: I struggle to let go of anything and justify why I need to hold on to everything!
- B: I’m good at sorting things into piles but sometimes the things I ‘throw’ creep back in…
- C: I love to declutter – it’s liberating to let go and make space for the new.
3. When you meet someone who knows exactly what they want, you find yourself feeling:
- A: Overwhelmed and intimidated by their decisiveness.
- B: Inspired to be more like they are.
- C: Respectful that you share a similar approach.
4. You’re shopping for a new TV and there’s so many to choose from. You settle the decision by…
- A: Reading as many reviews as you possibly can, eventually buying one and instantly questioning whether you made the right choice.
- B: Asking the person in the shop to pick for you and making sure it can be returned easily if needs be.
- C: Swiftly picking the first one that meets all of your criteria and is within budget.
5. It’s time to go for brunch with the girls. Would you prefer a café with a tasty but limited menu, or one with pages of items to choose from?
- A: One with a wide range of options – then I can be sure I’m picking the absolute best dish there is.
- B: I don’t mind either option – no matter how many options there are, I will deliberate...
- C: The fewer options the better! Spending the time with my friends is more important.
6. You decide to see a new movie and it turns out to be rubbish. You think:
- A: Next time I will set my expectations lower so I’m not disappointed.
- B: I did the best I could, but I regret my choice of film today.
- C: I don’t always make great decisions – and that’s ok.
7. Your boss emails asking you when to hold the next team building day. She asks for a quick response. You reply:
- A: I’d prefer to take my time than make the wrong choice on this.
- B: I’m a little overwhelmed – I need my colleagues to help me decide.
- C: I suggest Friday 6th – making the best decision I can with the knowledge I have on team commitments.
8. You’re booking a holiday to Bali and realise there are thousands of accommodation options. Do you:
- A: Spend weeks looking until you find the perfect deal, it’s out there somewhere!
- B: Set yourself a time limit – two nights to search before booking your top pick.
- C: Go with your gut and book the one you can imagine yourself in right away.
What your answers reveal...
Mostly As: Your quest for perfection hinders your decision-making
All your agonising over practically every decision brings extra stress into your life that you could do without. Rather than find it intimidating when someone around you is able to quickly and confidently make decisions, why not use these experiences to better understand what strategies others use to reach their goals, and how you could use or adapt these to give it a go yourself?
Start by making a small decision you feel satisfied with. Repeating this routine regularly will build your self-confidence in your ability to choose well within a reasonable timeframe.
Mostly Bs: You’re stuck in a loop of doubt and indecisiveness
Socially, you’re more likely to go with the crowd than state a preference, and while this takes the pressure off having to decide – it also means your needs are regularly going unmet.
It’s time to pick your battles and distinguish between what’s worth deliberating over, and what’s not. Use visualization to explore possible outcomes and when one resonates, trust your gut that it’s the right choice for you.
It may turn out it wasn’t the best option after all, but that’s okay! There’s something to learn from the experience. For now, change your focus from what could go wrong to what could go right.
Mostly Cs: You like to make a decision and stick to it
You have no problem deciding what’s right for you – you’re confident in your decision-making process and don’t waste a moment ruminating over the outcome.
While you’re efficient in the decision department, it does mean that sometimes you can jump headfirst into a decision before weighing up the options, being somewhat impulsive.
Remember, it’s okay to take your time and tune in to discover the best next step. Empower yourself with knowledge whether that’s reading, researching or talking to others, and you’ll continually be confident that your judgements are sound.
How to become a more decisive you
- Keep a healthy perspective: Life is short so don’t waste it sweating the small stuff. Save your energy to carefully consider the things that matter to you most, then simply and swiftly do your best when it comes to the rest.
- Make ‘good’ choices: Everyone wants to make ‘the right’ choices, and ‘good’ is usually good enough. Constantly striving for perfection is likely to create more stress, so remember that good really is good enough most of the time.
- Know your limit: Too many choices can be overwhelming so it helps to know where your limits lie and when your warning signs are indicating you’re heading for overwhelm. Limit your options to a more reasonable number and if they’re all similar – simply make a choice that feels most right for you.
- Stay curious: Sometimes you can get totally stuck when it comes to what to do next. In times like these, rather than following convention, ask yourself which option are you most curious to explore. Choose the one that sparks interest for you and you’d be most excited to experience it.
- Set a timer: While it can be useful to take some time to make a decision, too much time can send you around in circles chopping, changing and questioning your choices. Set yourself a reasonable time limit by which a final decision must be reached, and once you’re there stay firm, take action and accept the outcome. After all, what will be will be.
